What Do I Do with My Anger?

Anger is a natural, powerful emotion that everyone experiences. It can stem from frustration, hurt, annoyance, or disappointment. Handled correctly, anger can be a positive force for change and protection. However, if left unchecked, it can lead to health problems, damaged relationships, and even legal issues. If you find yourself frequently or intensely angry, it's important to develop strategies to manage this strong emotion effectively. Here's what you can do with your anger:

1 - Understand Your Anger

Before you can manage your anger, you need to understand what triggers it. Keep a diary of when you get angry, noting the triggers, how you feel, and how you respond. Understanding the source of your anger can provide insights into what might be underlying issues or unresolved conflicts.

2 - Take a Moment

When you feel anger bubbling up, give yourself a moment before reacting. Counting to ten, taking deep breaths, or removing yourself from the situation can help you regain control. This pause allows your rational mind to catch up with your emotions and can prevent you from saying or doing something you might regret.

3 - Express Anger Appropriately

Once you're calm, express your feelings in an assertive but non-confrontational way. Clearly and directly communicate your concerns without hurting others or trying to control them. Use "I" statements to focus on your feelings rather than blaming others.

4 - Exercise

Physical activity can provide an outlet for your emotions, especially if you're about to erupt. Go for a walk, run, or hit the gym—exercise releases endorphins, which can improve your mood and reduce stress.

5 - Problem Solve

Anger can signal that something in your life needs to change. Identify possible solutions to the issue at hand. Think of ways you can address the problem without anger. Focus on what you can control and work on letting go of things beyond your reach.

6 - Use Humor

Humor can help defuse rage in a number of ways. It can help you get a more balanced perspective. When you start to feel angry, try to see the situation in a humorous or absurd light. Of course, avoid sarcasm, as it can hurt others and increase tension.

7 - Practice Relaxation

Develop relaxation skills to use when you're feeling angry. Techniques like deep-breathing exercises, visualization, yoga, meditation, or listening to relaxing music can reduce feelings of anger and tension.

8 - Pray

What better way to quell the bitterness and heat of your anger than by taking your concerns directly to the God of the universe! No matter what your issue or concern, aligning your mind and spirit with God through prayer will enhance your perspective with a wiser point of view. We live, respond, and interact in a flesh body, limited by our own narrow scope. With prayer, we can rise above our own narrow viewpoint and see through the eyes of the One that is truly in control.

9 - Seek Help If Needed

If your anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret, or hurts those around you, it may be time to seek help. Talking about your feelings can help you understand why you're angry and what you can do about it. A friend, family member, or therapist can provide a different perspective and help you find solutions.Counseling or anger management classes can provide you with valuable skills to manage your emotions effectively.

10 - Let Go

Holding onto anger can cause a host of problems, including bitterness and vengeance. Forgiveness is a powerful tool. It doesn't mean you forget the harm done to you, but it does mean you let go of the anger and resentment tied to it.

Practicing the above when confronted by anger can help you face it head on and use it in a positive way. Anger can actually be a powerful impetus to move us into a better state of existence, IF we deal with it in a healthy way. If you find yourself having problems dealing with your anger, consider talking to someone like a coach or counselor to help you navigate your way through to a better place.